I want to Write a Poem

I Want To Write a Poem

I wanted to write a political poem full of controversy and conspiracy
One that spoke to the tastes
Of voters in the blue states
Because I like it when people agree with me.

I wanted to go to a strip club and order a lap dance
And write a poem about respecting women
While I was in a trance
With a bulge in my pants

I wanted to write a poem so musical you could groove to it
So motivating you’ve gotta move to it
So offensive your parents wouldn’t approve of it

I wanted to write a poem more potent than the potent potables on Jeopardy
A poetic verse more random than the potpourri category
Something that made me sound so smart Ken Jennings couldn’t question me

I wanted to perform a poem you’d play on MP3
A file you’d have to download illegally
From a server on the other side of the Caspian Sea

Because I want to wrap you up in poetic bliss
But instead all you get is this list
Even untalented poets deserve a stage to be heard on, so hear this

Poetry is the last unpolluted art form
A medium that can inform and transform
And every poet who steps on stage comes equipped to perform
Without worrying about record sales going lukewarm

So even the worst poet on Earth deserves your respect
Even if their poem is a verbal train wreck
They still came to the stage and tried to connect
To take part in this pure art that we all should protect.